I know we've had some great favorite quotes, but sometimes I just need a laugh.  So, I'm proposing that everyone post their favorite joke.  Make sure it's PG.  Post no matter how corny.  Can't wait to see what happens.


Categories: General

Comments
Last comment By: Bob Gooding   Fri, 22 Feb 2019 12:20:58 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

I had a hen that could count her own eggs....

 

She was a mathmachicken.

By: Duncan Gillis  Wed, 06 Feb 2019 22:24:20 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Q: What do you get when you cross a cow with an octopus?

 

A: A very strong rebuke from the campus research ethics committee AND an immediate halt to your funding!

 

(Can you tell I spent a good part of my career in academia? )

By: Eric Beatty  Wed, 06 Feb 2019 23:59:50 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Just remind me old joke "Why chicken cross the road?"

By: Christian Chu  Thu, 07 Feb 2019 00:13:47 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Q. Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?
A. She wanted to stretch her legs.

 

Q. Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?
A. She was afraid someone would Caesar!

 

Q. Why did the chicken cross the playground ?
A. To get to the other slide.

 

Q. Why did the rooster cross the road?
A. To cockadoodle dooo something.

 

Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

 

Q. Why did the turtle cross the road?
A. To get to the shell station.

 

Q. Why did the horse cross the road?
A. Because the chicken needed a day off.

 

Q. Why did the duck cross the road?
A. To prove he wasn't chicken!

 

Q. Why did the cow cross the road?
A. To get to the udder side!

 

Q. What happened when the elephant crossed the road?
A. It stepped on the chicken!

By: Jake Bakerin  Thu, 07 Feb 2019 00:16:38 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

 

 

4855493_700b.jpg1z18h7.jpg

By: Rick Campbell  Thu, 07 Feb 2019 16:12:18 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical looking parrots on a perch and says,"The parrot on the left costs $500 dollars."

 

"Why does the parrot cost so much?" asks the man. The owner says "Well the parrot knows how to use a computer."

 

The man then asks about the next parrot and learns that it costs $1,000 dollars because it can do everything the first parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system.

 

Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot, only to be told that it costs $2,000 dollars.

 

Needless to say this begs the question, "What can it do?" to which the owner replies, "To be honest I have never seen it do anything but the other two call him boss!"

By: Rick Campbell  Thu, 07 Feb 2019 19:09:17 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

ROTFLMAO!!!! 

By: Paul Salvador  Thu, 07 Feb 2019 19:22:27 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

FB_IMG_1549397270449.jpg

By: Duncan Gillis  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 03:41:53 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

LoL

By: Rubén Rodolfo Balderrama  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 11:08:45 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Perhaps Inappropriate?

 

Definitely HILARIOUS!

By: S. Casale  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 13:34:00 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

I think it should have a senior female giving the instruction and a soy-boy junior virtue signalling..  that would be less offensive perhaps

By: Rob Edwards  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 13:37:29 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

S. Casale wrote:

Perhaps Inappropriate?

Definitely HILARIOUS!

 

The truth is never inappropriate.

A joke is not funny without at least a sliver of truth.

By: Rick Becker  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 13:37:46 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Image may contain: text

By: Dennis Dohogne  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 14:00:49 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

No photo description available.

By: Dennis Dohogne  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 14:01:39 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Image may contain: text that says 'Do they have restaurants in Japan where American people cook in front of you with lawn chairs and a grill?'

By: Dennis Dohogne  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 14:02:50 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Image may contain: 1 person, meme and text

By: Dennis Dohogne  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 14:03:44 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Image may contain: text that says 'My pet rock isn't doing well today... I think he's stoned!'

By: Dennis Dohogne  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 14:05:02 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

wow,... it's mansplaining in the context of a joke... so much ivagination.   

 

..or, something in between?

spoon.gif

By: Paul Salvador  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 16:58:55 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Paul Salvador wrote:

 

wow,... it's mansplaining in the context of a joke... so much ivagination.

 

..or, something in between?

 

It's not mansplaining unless there is a woman is being splained to...

Is ivagination a typo or intended to be punny?

By: Rick Becker  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 18:00:30 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Its spork.

By: Frederick Law  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 18:10:23 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

oh,..hmm,.. you need a woman to explain things,.. that answers the next ivagination question then.. and, my intent was and always has been FPOON. 

By: Paul Salvador  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 18:11:49 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

no,.. it's has always been a FPOON,.. think about it.....

By: Paul Salvador  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 18:12:53 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Paul Salvador wrote:

no,.. it's has always been a FPOON,.. think about it.....

 

I assume the F is silent...

By: Rick Becker  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 18:39:15 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Paul Salvador wrote:

 

no,.. it's has always been a FPOON,.. think about it.....

There's a frood who really knows where his towel is.

By: Tom Gagnon  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 18:43:28 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Tom,.. brilliant!,.. that's a new word,.. well, for me .. now, where's my towel?. 

By: Paul Salvador  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 18:50:18 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Rick.. t'was just word play..  although, I thinking it's getting warm in here,.. ?

brainwash.jpg

By: Paul Salvador  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 19:00:18 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Paul Salvador wrote:

 

Tom,.. brilliant!,.. that's a new word,.. well, for me .. now, where's my towel?.

It's vocabulary from HHGG:

Hence a phrase that has passed into hitchhiking slang, as in "Hey, you sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? There's a frood who really knows where his towel is." (Sass: know, be aware of, meet, have sex with; hoopy: really together guy; frood: really amazingly together guy.)

 

 

— Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

By: Tom Gagnon  Fri, 08 Feb 2019 19:18:16 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Wed, 13 Feb 2019 12:39:05 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Wed, 13 Feb 2019 16:31:45 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Two cannibals had just finished eating a clown.  One cannibal said to the other, "Did that taste funny to you?"

By: Vance Wright  Wed, 13 Feb 2019 16:36:06 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Wed, 13 Feb 2019 16:46:43 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Man: “Honey, on this Valentine’s Day, I want to tell you something…I’m not rich like Jack. I don’t have a mansion like Russell. I don’t have a Porsche like Martin. But I do love you and I want to marry you.”

 

Woman: “Oh, dear, I love you too! What was that you said about Martin?”

By: Rick Campbell  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 12:42:42 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

A bodybuilder takes off his shirt and a blonde says, "Wow!  What a great chest you have!"

He says, "100 pounds of dynamite, babe!"

 

He takes off his pants and the blonde says, "What massive calves you have!"

He says, "100 pounds of dynamite, babe!"

 

He then removes his underwear and the blonde goes running, screaming in fear.  He puts his clothes on and chases her.  He catches up to her and asks why she ran like that.  The blonde replies, "I was afraid to be around all that dynamite after I saw how short the fuse was!"

By: Dennis Dohogne  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 12:59:45 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Dennis Dohogne wrote:

 

A bodybuilder takes off his shirt and a blonde says, "Wow! What a great chest you have!"

He says, "100 pounds of dynamite, babe!"

 

He takes off his pants and the blonde says, "What massive calves you have!"

He says, "100 pounds of dynamite, babe!"

 

He then removes his underwear and the blonde goes running, screaming in fear. He puts his clothes on and chases her. He catches up to her and asks why she ran like that. The blonde replies, "I was afraid to be around all that dynamite after I saw how short the fuse was!"

Steroids baby! Breakfast of Chumpions!

By: Tony Tieuli  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 13:06:22 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Mike walked into a post office just before Valentine’s Day. He couldn’t help noticing a middle-aged, balding man standing in a corner sticking “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them.  Then the man got out a bottle of Channel perfume from his pocket and started spraying scent over the envelopes.

 

By now Mike’s curiosity had got the better of him, and so I asked the man why he was sending all those cards.  The man replied, “I’m sending out 500 Valentine cards signed, ‘Guess who?'”

 

“But why?” asked Mike.

 

“I’m a divorce lawyer,” the man replied.

By: Rick Campbell  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 14:56:15 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

By: Dennis Dohogne  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 15:14:21 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Pin code for darling

PIN_CODE.png

By: Vladimir Urazhdin  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 15:48:13 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 19:12:19 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

What’s the difference between a $20 steak and a $60 steak?

 

 

 

 

 

February 14th.

By: Rick Campbell  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 20:20:26 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Yep

By: Vance Wright  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 20:23:14 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Rick Campbell wrote:

 

What’s the difference between a $5 Rose and a $500 Rose?

 

 

 

 

 

February 14th.

By: Frederick Law  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 20:28:14 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Yup...that too!

By: Rick Campbell  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 20:34:42 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Frederick Law wrote:

 

Rick Campbell wrote:

 

What’s the difference between a $5 Rose and a $500 Rose?

 

 

 

 

 

February 14th.

The first 3 times I bought my wife flowers she was not impressed. Plainly she asked, "What are those for?" We've been together 10 years, married 6 this year. She doesn't get flowers.

By: S. Casale  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 20:36:57 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Good thing wife is allergic

I had a bunch in the trunk once and she was in tears when she got in the car.

By: Frederick Law  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 20:38:03 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Frederick Law wrote:

 

Rick Campbell wrote:

 

What’s the difference between a $5 Rose and a $500 Rose?

 

 

 

 

 

February 14th.

Get some and nothing

By: Christian Chu  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 20:42:31 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Frederick Law - what did you spray them with, that spray could be a hot seller.....  An allergy enhancement, no need to ever buy your wife flowers again...

By: John Stoltzfus  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 20:43:47 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

John Stoltzfus wrote:

 

Frederick Law - what did you spray them with, that spray could be a hot seller..... An allergy enhancement, no need to ever buy your wife flowers again...

Patent it too!

By: Edward Poole  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 21:38:31 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Funniest thing I've seen all week.

Capture.PNG

By: Chris England  Thu, 14 Feb 2019 21:52:08 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Fri, 15 Feb 2019 12:29:09 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

My boss yelled at me today “It’s the fifth time you’ve been late to work this week! Do you know what that means?!” I said, “Probably that it’s Friday?”…

By: Rick Campbell  Fri, 15 Feb 2019 13:23:28 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

A guy walks into a lumberyard and asks for some two-by-fours.

 

The clerk asks, "How long do you need them?"

 

The guy answers, "A long time. We're building a house."

By: Rick Campbell  Fri, 15 Feb 2019 17:36:46 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Fri, 15 Feb 2019 18:23:01 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

IMG_3760.JPG

By: Rick Campbell  Fri, 15 Feb 2019 20:50:46 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Fri, 15 Feb 2019 21:02:54 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Mon, 18 Feb 2019 17:22:28 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

There was a Hodown in the red section of Amsterdam, as recent as yesterday...

By: John Stoltzfus  Mon, 18 Feb 2019 17:26:54 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

John Stoltzfus wrote:

 

There was a Hodown in the red section of Amsterdam, as recent as yesterday...

Ken Jeong's wife is a Tran ho.

 

By: S. Casale  Mon, 18 Feb 2019 17:33:09 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

The she is what I thot she was

By: John Stoltzfus  Mon, 18 Feb 2019 17:34:22 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

John Stoltzfus wrote:

 

The she is what I thot she was

You really like that word Thot.

lmao

It's interweb hilarious!!!

By: S. Casale  Mon, 18 Feb 2019 17:35:18 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

What gets dirtier the more it cleans?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

...A towel.

By: Tyler Williams  Mon, 18 Feb 2019 17:39:46 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

LOL - just checking how long it will be till someone picked up on it.....  It all started here when one of the Customer Service sent me a copy of an email from one of our "on the road Sales people", this email was sent to our HR guy...  Whatever the conversation was all about, the sales guy said to the HR guy that he had a good thot.

By: John Stoltzfus  Mon, 18 Feb 2019 17:40:10 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

haha...

ha

That's sounds as bad as the looks given when my HR manager was rubbing the back of my neck in a company party luncheon.

By: S. Casale  Mon, 18 Feb 2019 17:52:38 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

John Stoltzfus wrote:

 

There was a Hodown in the red section of Amsterdam, as recent as yesterday...

I hope somebody helped her up!

By: Tony Tieuli  Tue, 19 Feb 2019 11:58:33 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Couple of people showed up, had to brush her off, she was down and dirty.....  She didn't just lay there either...

By: John Stoltzfus  Tue, 19 Feb 2019 12:06:58 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

I actually looked it up about a week ago because I didn't know what it meant.

 

THOT = That Hoe Over There

 

Chris

By: Christopher Estelow  Tue, 19 Feb 2019 13:50:38 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

An old lady walked into a pet store, found a parrot and asked the owner if she could buy it. The owner said, "Heck no! That parrot has a bad mouth! Trust me - you do not want that parrot!"

 

She said, "I can teach it good manners."

 

But, when she got home the parrot said a bad word, so she put it in the freezer for 10 seconds.

 

She took it out and said, "Did you learn your lesson?" It said another bad word so she put it back in for 30 seconds. She took it out and asked if it learned its lesson yet.

 

The parrot said "Brr... Yes I learned my lesson...but what did the chicken do?"

By: Rick Campbell  Tue, 19 Feb 2019 15:58:16 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: Dennis Dohogne  Tue, 19 Feb 2019 19:43:50 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?

.

.

.

.

Because it got stuck in a crack.

By: Rick Campbell  Tue, 19 Feb 2019 20:03:18 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Genius ...

By: Jake Bakerin  Tue, 19 Feb 2019 20:47:28 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Three guys were talking in a bar. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet.

 

After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, '"Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?"

 

The third fellow says, "I'll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees."

 

The first two guys were amazed. "What happened then?" they asked.

 

She said, "Get out from under the bed and fight like a man."

By: Rick Campbell  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 14:09:29 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

I went to the Zoo the other day, and there was only one dog in it...

 

It was a Shitzu!

By: Rick Campbell  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:03:44 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

?

By: Jake Bakerin  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:14:50 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

$hit zoo

By: Frederick Law  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:20:54 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Jake Bakerin wrote:

 

?

Don't feel bad, took me a minute too!

By: Tony Tieuli  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:23:48 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

I got the word. What's funny about it?

By: Jake Bakerin  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:29:23 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: John Stoltzfus  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:37:20 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Rick Campbell wrote:

 

I went to the Zoo the other day, and there was only one dog in it...

 

It was a Shitzu!

 

That's a pretty crappy zoo.

 

MUAHAHAHAHAHA

By: Dan Pihlaja  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:44:56 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Zohan?

Resultado de imagen para Scrapy coco dog

By: Rubén Rodolfo Balderrama  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:49:28 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

No, different dog.

西施

A Shih Tzu (UK: /ˌʃˈts/, US: /ˈʃˌts/;[1] Chinese: 西施; pinyin: xīshī quǎn), also known as the Chrysanthemum Dog, is a toy dog breed, weighing from 4 to 7.25 kilograms (9–16 lbs) when fully grown.[2] The breed developed in China. The exact origin is unknown and is thought to have originated in the Tibetan Plateau.

By: Frederick Law  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 18:56:18 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

What do you get when you breed a Bull Terrier with a Shih Tzu?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You get a Bull Shihtz.

By: Dennis Dohogne  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 19:14:07 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

it's a good one, Dennis

By: Jake Bakerin  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 19:17:06 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

You can tell a lot about a woman from her hands. 

like when they are wrapped around your throat you know

that she is pretty darn upset about something. 

By: David Matula  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 19:38:35 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

wetwussy.png

By: Paul Salvador  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 19:48:50 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Paul Salvador wrote:

 

wetwussy.png

The funniest thing about that is that I did...... both times! 

By: Tony Tieuli  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 20:22:42 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

A very nerdy limerick I made up while in school...this is likely the only suitable forum for ever sharing it...

 

 

A student of algebra math

Had chosen the wrong career path

Tho' sad, the fact is

He cannot tell his

Asymptote from a hole in the graph

 

 

 

By: James Harvey  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 20:24:11 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Tony Tieuli  wrote:

 

Paul Salvador wrote:

 

wetwussy.png

The funniest thing about that is that I did...... both times!

You think that's bad, you needin to read it twice, you should seen the damage "Mike" did when he read it from the other side of the room, no idea why the Geico guys thot it was funny..  The office is almost trashed...

By: John Stoltzfus  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 20:33:19 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Here's my favorite limerick. I hope the formatting doesn't suck.

 

(12+144+20)+3√4

------------------------  + (5 x 11) = 9² +0

              7

 

It reads,

 

A dozen, a gross, and a score

plus three times the square root of four

divided by seven

plus five times eleven

is nine squared and not a bit more

By: Tom Gagnon  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 21:23:41 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Awesome!

By: S. Casale  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 21:24:12 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

I SHARED THIS WITH MY WIFE.

 

Her response, "Sure did." tee-heehehehe

By: S. Casale  Wed, 20 Feb 2019 21:57:15 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

A man walks into a bar and orders a drink. He notices there are pieces of meat nailed to the ceiling of the bar, so he asks the bartender what they are for.

 

The bartender replied, "If you can jump up and pull one of them down, you get free beer all night. If you fail, you have to pay the bar $100. Do you want to have a go?"

 

The man thinks about it for a minute before saying, "Nah, the steaks are too high!"

By: Rick Campbell  Thu, 21 Feb 2019 13:20:37 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

What do you call a pitbull with steel balls and no back legs?

 

 

 

 

 

Sparky

 

Chris

By: Christopher Estelow  Thu, 21 Feb 2019 13:46:59 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

I felt the pain, and said out loud OOHH, when I read that, glad no one was close enough to hear it

By: John Stoltzfus  Thu, 21 Feb 2019 13:55:02 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

'tis true that for beauty I am no star,

there are others more handsome by far.

But my face - I don't mind it,

For I am behind it.

It's the people in front that I jar.

By: Don Carter  Thu, 21 Feb 2019 15:02:08 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

By: David Matula  Thu, 21 Feb 2019 18:30:26 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

ROTFLMAO!...  Bad Dog! 

By: Paul Salvador  Thu, 21 Feb 2019 18:51:36 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Had to cover my mouth and took all my will power to not laugh out loud

Good thing I didn't bust out laughing since the boss is in the room - and I wouldn't be able to tell him the joke because he doesn't have a good sense of humor.

By: Rick McDonald  Thu, 21 Feb 2019 23:56:25 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Was eating lunch today at Subway and this older guy goes into get a sandwich and starts talking with the girl behind the counter.

He decides to tell here a joke.

One Sunday during a church service the church doors fly open.  The Devil enters the church.  All the parishioners go running out of the church screaming - all except for one old man. The Devil walks up to the man and asks "aren't you afraid of me?".

The man looks the Devil straight in the eyes and says "No - Not at all, I have been married to your sister for 5 years"!

By: Rick McDonald  Fri, 22 Feb 2019 00:03:15 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

Don't tell this joke to your wife or be ready to pack your stuff and sleep in the sofa

By: Christian Chu  Fri, 22 Feb 2019 00:08:55 GMT
Re: Non-Technical thread:Favorite (clean) jokes

When clowns divorce and there are children in the middle, does it always have to end with a huge custardy battle?

By: Bob Gooding  Fri, 22 Feb 2019 12:20:58 GMT
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